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On the second day of Christmas my true love said to me, "The yellow pages are in the desk drawer. What do you need them for?"
"I've got to look for an Indian Shaman"
"You want a what, Frank? What the heavens for?"
"Mimi's in trouble, she has a pest problem."
"Pest problem? Wouldn't you want an exterminator."
"No, an exterminator wouldn't work. She has possums invading her home."
"Possums. I think she'd still need an exterminator, or a Wildlife Officer to handle them."
"No silly. Possums are like Zombie rats. If you call an exterminator they will just play dead and the exterminator will think he's finished. And they'll do the same thing to a Wildlife Officer.
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"I still think you need an exterminator."
"No a shaman will do the trick, but I've got to hurry. Possums are little thieves and like to hide things in their pouches. Mimi thinks
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"Frank, now your not only being silly, your being rude too."
"No Lola, that's not what I mean. Mimi has some special homemade marbles that her Grandfather made out of stone. I hope those little buggars didn't get at them."
"I still think your not going to have any luck."
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"Well, what happened?"
"He told me to look under P in the yellow pages for Pied Pipers."
"Told you."
And a Gem-osophy once known as "Staircase wit."
3 comments:
Brilliant! Post!
I'm tickled pink to be Day Two in your Twelve Days series. What a fabulous idea. Bud is right. This idea is brilliant. There's just one thing.....The picture of that horrible possum made my skin crawl (again) YUK YUK YUK.
Thanks for featuring me, Frank.
Frank, you are the sweetest guy in the Northern Hemisphere. Maple sugar candy is bitter compared to you. You are a man who empathizes with a woman's fear of rodents and probably our other irrational fears. Splendid post. Shamans R Us?
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