Mimi Dating Comeback Contest #17

Round 17 of Mimi's Dating profile Comeback Challenge is now underway. (Well, was underway. I started this post on Sunday, but Blogger didn't seem to want to upload images for me. I waited as long as ten minutes for one pic to load. It wasn't until this morning that I was able to get many of the pics I saved onto the blog).

As in my other comeback posts, the Bachelor's profiles or snippets are in red, my comebacks are in yellow. I also play the role of the Bachelor adding his own remark because, well it's fun to do. Do you really think that these guys would give up without a fight? They'll try one last time because 'no' is never an answer (they either don't understand the word, or can't spell it), or they'll have a 'sour grapes' snide comment to say. Anything else that I find humorous, I'll post in blue.

The following are Mimi's rules for the Comeback Challenge.
The Rules

1. I've posted ten headlines and/or essay snippets below. Spelling errors are from original profiles and not my own. Write a comedic response to any or all of these. The more you can answer, the better your chance of winning.

2. You have until 11:59 pm MONDAY EST to send in your answers via email. Type "Saturday Comeback Challenge" in the subject line and include the name and url of your blog.

3. I try to keep this as family-friendly as possible without sacrificing humor. I won't post inappropriate or sexually explicit responses. Subtle is good!

4. I will announce the winner in Tuesday's post. You will get a link back to your site, a permanent place in my sidebar, and a winner's badge for your website -plus untold fame and glory! (Mostly untold)
Here we go.........

1. I like to take long walks in the ocean.

Just don't expect me to part it for you.

There's plenty of other fish, I'm sure of it.






2. I'm not going to brag or bloat about my accomplishments.

A blow-hard, water-retaining couch potato should not overstate their feats.

Then I won't show you my Linda Lovelace Trophy I won for 'Best Technique' in a Hot Dog Eating contest.






3. Recently Devestated

Don't try the sympathy bit, that's a bowling ball in that bag, not a wrecking ball.

Guess I won't try going for the spare then.

4. I moved here from Indiana, spent 20 years there. But everytime I would go on vacation I would end up at the Beach. So I decided to move to one.

When you're tanning, the frequent interruptions from Greenpeace doesn't disturb you?

Nope, just as long as they do my back.








5. I like camping and cannoing, those are best when combined on a river some were.

You're absolutely right. You set up the tent and sleeping bags, and I'll meet you in the canoe.

You think I was born yesturday, you know I'd have to start the fire first.

For some reason google didn't have a picture of tents on a river, so I settled for this picture. If anyone wants to colour it, just print it out and grab some crayons ;)






6. There are guys out there that are beeter looking than me but no one can treat a woman like she deserves beeter than me. So if this tempts anyone drop me a line and see if I bite.

Ike, didn't you try this line on Tina once?

But I've upgraded to the WBT-halfie, they say yellow is my colour.

I really didn't know what I was going to use as a comeback line for this one. I entered wifebeaters on google and the Ike picture came up. Well need I say more?



7. I can do anything.(there's nothing you can do that can't be done)

I'm a magician, so how's your disappearing act?

Hey, I didn't say I was going to dream the impossible.





8. My favorite thing to watch on TV is Competitive Cat Grooming.

Why do I have this urge to cough up a hair ball?

Wanna pet my....








9. Be for I start let me make something clear. If you are one of these fake pepole known to be on these personal sights, Then you can stop here. Don't want are need any B.S. So don't wast my time.








(Note: Above white-space is my comeback line, didn't want to wast anymore of his time. You know us fake pepoles, just making it clear enough for him. Darn, Shoo puppy! Go find a real pepole.)

Hello, Hello?.... Bitch!

10. I am a good man who has slipped between the cracks of the New World.

Just what I need, another Renaissance man.

So you're saying it's my fault?

Thanks again Mimi for another fun round of The Dating Comeback Challenge
Mimi has also declared a Blogblast for Peace on June 6, 2007
Please stop by Mimi Writes and get your Peace Globe