Friday, December 22, 2006

The Twelve Blogging days of Christmas: Day Six

On the Sixth Blogging Day of Christmas my true love said to me, "What the hell are you doing to the computer now?"
"And where did you get that piece of crap."
"What, this classic reel to reel recorder?"
"Yes, and quit dodging Frank."
"I got it at Radio Shack. It's really a classic piece and I need it to hook up to my computer."
"No, you don't need it, you just want it. Why?"
"I'm trying to get WTIT Tape radio working. I've tried everything to get the station working--ipods, satelite radio reciever, my old crystal radio I made in High School, heck, I even tried using Mom and Dad's old shortwave radio and nothing seems to work. So I thought WTIT being a Tape Radio station might need a good tape recorder to work properly."
"And how much did this classic junk set us back."
"It was on sale."
"Oh, that's so much different Frank. How much?"
"Only eight hundred, but it's a classic and I've always needed one."
"With all the music you and the kids have haurded on your computer and saved on all these CDs, you need an old reel to reel to...let's see...record the one song that WTIT features daily using bestaudiocodes. Why didn't you go buy an old eight track car deck player too, that way you could make it portable too."
"You can't buy blank tapes anymore. And what do you mean the one song, WTIT is a radio station."
"It's a blog."
"Yeah, and a radio station."
"Look. Click here. Now go down. See the name Mimi has for the link to WTIT."
"What's it say?"
"Bud Weiser's Silent Radio Station WTIT....Oh. But that's Mimi teasing Bud."
"No, that's Mimi being quite a bit smarter than Frank is right now."
"No, buts. Take it back."
"It's a collector's item though."
"And you're an antique, but eBay's not interested."
"Do you think...."
"No, just take it back. The last classic piece you bought on a whim is where?"
"Okay, point taken. Still love me?"
"Yes, and your collection of 'left-handed nails' you had bronzed."

Five Fungi Thinking

Merry Christmas
See you on the next round of Mimi's Dating Comeback Challenge Bud!!
And keep checking back for the Weekly Adventures of
George and Fred the Armadillo
by Jodi Sirianni

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

The Twelve Blogging days of Christmas: Day Five

On the Fifth day of Christmas my true love said to me, "Here, drink this you'll feel better."
"I hope so cause this really sucks. What is it, it looks kind of yucky."
"Never mind what it is, just drink it. We've got to get your temperature down, it's still too high."
"Is there any rum in it? A hot toddy sounds like just the ticket."
"No, but it will make you feel better."
"Rather have a couple of hot toddy's, maybe four, then I won't care how shitty I feel right now."
"No, this will do just fine."
"Gross, what the heck did you put in this?"
"Never mind, just drink it. It will make you feel a little better."
"Well if it won't cure me, it will definitely kill me. Maybe a little rum in it will help."
"No, no rum. Last thing I need is you sick, and hung-over. "
"Okay, okay, I'll drink it. Maybe a little shot of rum to wash it down after."
"Okay, I'm just joking, but this is really gross. Tastes like caster oil mixed with sand. Where did you find this concoction."
"It's an old recipe of my mother's, she used to call it pixie juice."
"They had pixies in Poland?"
"Of course they had pixies, and fairies in Poland. All over Europe, but in Poland there's about 10 different kinds of pixies and fairies, some good pixies and some evil pixies, most of which you'd never be able to pronounce."
"I think this must be the evil pixie juice, no good pixie could make anything taste this bad."
"Just drink it. It aways made me feel better after."
"That's just the sense of victory for being able to finish it."
"Okay, I'm done. Now about that hot toddy."
"Just joking. There's really that many types of pixies and fairies in Poland?"
"Yes, there's all kinds. Most countries in Eupore had some type of pixie or fairie lore. In Poland there's jarmark, targ, targi, piękny, jasny, prawy, słuszny, and uczciwy which are various types of fairies, and there's chochlik, wróżka which are pixies."
"Chocolate is a type of pixie? Maybe that's where brownies come from."
"Chochlik, not chocolate, I told you you'd never pronounce them. And yes, a chochliki is a type of brownie."
"I've been reading a lot about brownies, pixies and fairies on Laura's blog Fungi Thinking. There is lots of information about fungi, and anything pixie. There's even recipes that you can make from the fungi. Maybe you should check it out. There might be a better tasting recipe for pixie juice there."
"Really. All of her information on fungi include poisonous ones."
"I guess so, she writes about all types of fungi, and even has a contest to identify them. Why do you ask?"
"Keep it up."
"Funny thing, I feel so much better now."
"Keep it up."

Merry Christmas

Friday, December 15, 2006

The Twelve Blogging days of Christmas: Day Four

On the Fourth day of Christmas my True Love said to me,
"What the heck do you want my Harlequin for?"
"Uhmm, nothing honey."
"It's for another one of those blog mymy things or something, isn't it."
"Well, yeah, on Lizza's blog there is this cool little itsy bitsy meme about finding page 123 on any book and typing in three sentenses after the fifth."
"I thought it would be something like that, but you're not going to use that Harlequin, everyone will think your nuts. There's got to be something else around."
"All I could find is this cook book, and everything on the odd pages is a picture, so that's no good."
"Well what happened to all of your books."
"I lent most of them out, remember. But it's okay. I still can do the Thursday Thirteens, even if it is early Friday morning."
"Thursday Thirteens. Whats that one about?"
"I'm supposed to tell thirteen things about myself."
"Why don't you tell them about all the superheros you've dressed up as for our Wednesday Wonderfuls. Hercules, Zorro, Don Quixote, The Flash, and your Mark Anthony was a real hit with me."
"Oh, I get it. Your still mad that I fell asleep at the wheel yesturday."
"Ha. Asleep at the wheel?. You were asleep before you even got in the car."
"That's not funny."
"You're so right."
"Okay, I know. I'll make it up to you. How about a little cataglottism."
"Cat a who?"
"Cataglottism. It means French Kissing. I learned it on Gem's word wonk."
"Not until you brush your teeth first. You ate garlic at work last night didn't you?"
"Well it was the Italian Buffet. What was I supposed to do say no? I'll go brush my teeth and be right back."

"Why don't you save it for your next hero. You'll owe me a BIG Cat Kiss by then."
"How does Ursalla and George of the Jungle sound."
"Now I know your going bananas."
"And I thought you wanted to monkey around."

Two Mimi Writes
A nd a Gem-osophy once known as "Staircase Wit"
Merry Christmas

Thursday, December 14, 2006

The Twelve Blogging days of Christmas: Day Three

O n the third day of Christmas my true love said to me, "What are you doing with all this stuff on the table."
"I'm gathering three of everything I like, and dislike, things I want to learn, and other stuff so I can take pictures of them."
"Why do you want to take pictures of all this junk?'
"Because I found a neat meme on Irene's blog about Threes that I want to do."
"I figured it would have to do with blogging. You better put all this stuff away when your done."
"I will."
"Now where are you going?"
"To Jodi's room, I want to find some of her comics that she drew, I love them."
"Which comics, I think you should ask her before you put them on that blog thingy of yours."
"I already did. She liked the idea."

"You're going to use this one. I don't think you told her that."

"Yeah I'm going to use it. I like her quirky comics. There's never any dialog in them just George and the Fred and the bad luck they usually have. Like this one, George gets the idea to start a lemonade stand then it starts raining."
"I don't think that she'll like you using George and Fred the Armadillo comic. She hasn't even told George that she is drawing comics about him."
"I'm not going to tell the whole blog world that my daughter draws comics of her boyfriend and an armadillo just to poke fun at his big nose."
"I hope not, we poke enough fun about it around here, especially you."
"He knows that it's all in good fun. He's not that nasal, I mean anal about it."
"Well, you'd better hurry up. It's Wednesday night, well early Thursday morning, and you know what that means. And I don't want you falling asleep at that computer again today."
"Ooh, I nearly forgot superhero night.
Give me ten more minutes and I'll be right there hon. How about Marc Anthony and Cleopatra"
"Marc Anthony? You know I like my superheros."
"Well he is in a way a superhero of history, afterall he stole the Queen of the Nile's heart, and you know that Pharoh's were reveered as Gods."
"Yeah, but didn't Liz Taylor get bit in the asp in the end."
"Lola, really! I'll be there in a few minutes. You go get ready."
"Marc Anthony! Marc Anthony! Take me and all of Egypt!"
"Marc. Hey Marc."
"Frank, Yoohoo....Shit. No wonder Rome fell in a day."

Two Mimi Writes
A nd a Gem-osophy once known as "Staircase Wit"

Merry Christmas

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

The Twelve Blogging days of Christmas: Day Two

On the second day of Christmas my true love said to me, "The yellow pages are in the desk drawer. What do you need them for?"
"I've got to look for an Indian Shaman"
"You want a what, Frank? What the heavens for?"
"Mimi's in trouble, she has a pest problem."
"Pest problem? Wouldn't you want an exterminator."
"No, an exterminator wouldn't work. She has possums invading her home."
"Possums. I think she'd still need an exterminator, or a Wildlife Officer to handle them."
"No silly. Possums are like Zombie rats. If you call an exterminator they will just play dead and the exterminator will think he's finished. And they'll do the same thing to a Wildlife Officer. She needs a Shaman because they have ways of stopping them from playing possum and leading them away for good."
"I still think you need an exterminator."
"No a shaman will do the trick, but I've got to hurry. Possums are little thieves and like to hide things in their pouches. Mimi thinks
that they may have found all her little Peace Globes, because she can't find them anywhere. I hope she doesn't loose her marbles too."
"Frank, now your not only being silly, your being rude too."
"No Lola, that's not what I mean. Mimi has some special homemade marbles that her Grandfather made out of stone. I hope those little buggars didn't get at them."
"I still think your not going to have any luck."
"Hello, Shaman's r Us...Yes, I'd like to hire a shaman to handle a possum problem...Yes, they've been prowling for quite a while and causing lots of problems....I need a shaman to lead them away....They've been hiding in closets and scaring the household with their beady little eyes....What's that...Well same to you buddy!"
"Well, what happened?"
"He told me to look under P in the yellow pages for Pied Pipers."
"Told you."

And a Gem-osophy once known as "Staircase wit."

Tuesday, December 12, 2006

The Twelve Blogging days of Christmas: Day One.

On the first Blogging day of Christmas my true love said to me "Wake up and go to bed, you've been on that computer all night."

"W-w-what honey?"

"Wake up, you've been at it all night."

"I know, but I'm behind in wall reviews, and one of my favorite blogs have changed. I'm not sure what's wrong."

"What blog, what do you mean changed?"

"You know, Gale's blog, the one with the French name I can't pronounce."

"Oh, you mean the one that means funny staircases, or something like that."

"Yeah, that's the one. Something has gone wrong, I think? The name has changed to Gem-osophy. So I'm studying her blog so I can find out how to become a Gemosophist. I got pretty good at finding all the funny staircases, although I was usually late on the uptake, but now I think I can get a jump on all the Gemisms before that funny guy from that radio blog gets all the funny ones."

"Well, there's always tomorrow. But now, you need some sleep."
"I know, but if that Bud guy puts in his pearl of a gemism before I get my topazology done-I'll, I'll, well I don't know what I'll do. He's probably even a Topazer himself--with my luck."

"Don't get too jaded, hon. You'll do well, you alway's do."

"Thank's honey, your right. I'll go get some sleep."

Stay tuned for The Twelve Blogging Days of Christmas: Day Two

Thursday, December 07, 2006

Thursday Thirteens

Thirteen Things about Frank Sirianni

1…. I don't really live in a cave, I'm just old enough to. Not to say I'm as old as dirt, but I'm not sure if it's the big rain I remember, or if it was that guy who ran across the lake. Either way, I think I remember being the brat that peed in the pool.

2. I like the word vert. No, not the French word for green--although I do like green. When I was young, I thought of myself as a pre(vert), so I had ambitions of becoming a lovable crotchety old post(vert), I was never interested in the per type though. But now that I am a postvert, I want to go into the wayback machine and tell myself to invest in pharmaceuticals and not to worry about it for they will invent a little blue pill and everyone will be dancing and singing to old show tunes.

3. I like Grande Marnier. No it's not an infatuation, it's a lust. I know that's why I became a bartender so I could get closer and cuddle up to that beautiful brown bottle. Now that I look like that bottle, I wonder if the Execs in France could use a poster boy. All I would need is a brown shirt and red tie.

4. I'm not an artist, but I really love to draw. It's become a passion that got me into blogging in the first place.

5. I'm finding that I really like to write (although my writing skills need much work). And that is thanks to #4 above, and some very special blog friends such as Gale Martin, and Mimi Lenox that inspire and challenge me.

6. I have le'spririt de l'attrium ie. Foyer Wit. (Sorry Gem ggg). It's a skill and survival technique that got me past most of the bullies (and detentions) all through high school. My comebacks can be so fast that you'd think I said them in the foyer before I even got in the room.

7. I have a wide ranging sense of humor. I usually can find the humor in just about anything.

8. I'm nuts about computers (when they're not acting up like right this moment). Counting my current Comrock Presaristone, I have owned 11. My first was a Timex Sinclair 1000 that had a hardwired version of the Basic Programing language that needed to be hooked into a TV. Why don't we have a HAL 1000 yet, it's way past 2001!

9. I don't like Lima beans, and I don't know why. Everything else that is edible, and maybe some things that shouldn't be are fair game for me.

10. I'm not a Trekkie, or a Trekker, I'm a Trekkster. I've calculated that if I were to watch all of the Star Treks (all series and movies) that I have watched to date as one sitting, it would take six years 4 months to do.

11. Battlestar Gallactica (new and old), and Babylon Five are close runners up. What can I say, I like Sci-Fi. That's why I placed the Honk'n'Holl'r Inn Space.

12. I'm not a big organized sporst fan. I just don't see the point as a spectator. sure going to any game can be fun--beer, tailgate parties, beer...did I say beer. But I don't see the point of going crazy for these big sports games on TV. I can understand playing them, I've really enjoyed playing many sports. I think as far as 'spectating' being a sport, I'm all for women's beach volleyball. Come on girls, I'm sure you could come up wiith a few 'spectating sports' for yourselves as well.

14. (Just joking) I love anything science related. Planetariums, museums--you name it. If it's science, I'm there. I even just recently found an interesting blog called Astronomical Drawings by Sebastion Lehrer from Germany. His blog is filled with drawings that he made from what he viewed with his telescope. It is a very interesting blog, and the renderings are very beautiful.

Links to other Thursday Thirteens!
1. (leave your link in comments, I’ll add you here!)

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

Sunday, December 03, 2006

Too late for Friday Flash-Again, and Things you've done Meme

Yet again, I'm late as usual for Gale Martin's Friday Flash Fiction. But better late than never. I think that Gale (Gem) has a great idea with this Friday Flash Fiction, just wish it was called Monday Manic Manifest then I might be able to get it in on time. Who invented working for a living anyway? It gets in the way of playing with my blog-friends!

This weeks word that must be used in the story was 'Original'. But seeing that not only am I late, I might as well break the rules and be 'original' too. Yes, I used the word, just differently, and it allowed me to play with some potty humor. Afterall, my imood today is cheeky!

Stand-Up's a Killer
Only you would come up with a line like that” Sabrina said as she looked at Robbie practicing his stand-up routine.

Really, why?” Robbie asked sternly being little put out by her comment. “It’s not just telling jokes you know, people tell jokes, but for comedians it's about stories, timing, misdirecting the audience, and yes, sometimes a little shock value.”

Isn’t it more about being funny? That last bit sure wasn’t”

God Sabrina, what’s wrong with it? ‘Just what I expected dual exhausts,’ isn’t even a vulgar line. You’re usually my best critic, but you’re making it sound like I’m telling Little Johnny Jokes , or worse.”

I’m just saying that the last bit is just toilet trash. Maybe you should put it in a Little Johnny Joke just so people would excuse it for being so incorrect. You will have to include Little Suzy, too, for that line to work. You could piss off the males in the audience as well though. Oh, I forgot, men always find toilet humour funny, especially fart jokes.”

Now come on. Saying that Little Johnny and Little Suzy were sitting in a sandbox playing with their toys, and suddenly Johnny farts and a little poof of sand plumes up behind him. And yada yada yada , Little Suzy lets one go and blows them both out of the sandbox and leaves Little Suzy unconscious just isn’t stand up material.”

And don’t forget that Little Johnny has to get up and look under her dress, or your line looses all of it’s toilet trash glory.”

Little Johnny and Little Suzy eh, mm-m-might be workable. I'll call them Little Franky and Little Lola though, just to be different.”
Things I've Done Meme

I found this Meme on Mimi Lenox's Mimi Writes blog. I thought I'd give it a try for the fun of it.

Things You've Done
Copy, bold the things you’ve done and post. Here are mine:

01. Bought everyone in the bar a drink
02. Swam with wild dolphins --No, but have been splashed by them.
03. Climbed a mountain
04. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive. --No, but every winter Ferrari test drives their cars, and Grande Prairie is on the route from Florida to Alaska. It's kind of cool seeing 20 Ferraris parked outside the Hotel every winter, to test the cars in winter conditions.
05. Been inside the Great Pyramid.--I'm usually not invited to private clubs.
06. Held a tarantula--UH UH Now way
07. Taken a candlelit bath with someone
08. Said “I love you” and meant it
09. Hugged a tree --Iwas drunk at the time and I swear it hugged back
10. Bungee jumped
11. Visited Paris
12. Watched a lightning storm at sea
13. Stayed up all night long and saw the sun rise--Up here, in the summer, Sunrise and sunset are only a couple of hours apart.
14. Seen the Northern Lights--And they are a beautiful sight.
15. Gone to a huge sports game--But I'm not a big sports fan.
16. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa--Nope, took the escalater carrying a tower of pizzas though.
17. Grown and eaten your own vegetables
18. Touched an iceberg.
19. Slept under the stars
20. Changed a baby’s diaper
21. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon
22. Watched a meteor shower
23. Gotten drunk on champagne --Happy New Ye--oops, I can wait
24. Given more than you can afford to charity
25. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope
26. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment--During my wedding vows. Hey, I was 19 at the time, and was always giggly when public speaking.
27. Had a food fight
28. Bet on a winning horse--don't gamble
29. Asked out a stranger--My wife and I never went on a date--really. We just worked togerther.
30. Had a snowball fight
31. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can
32. Held a lamb
33. Seen a total eclipse of the moon.
34. Ridden a roller coaster
35. Hit a home run
36. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking--right before I hugged that tree.
37. Adopted an accent for an entire day
38. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment
39. Had two hard drives for your computer
40. Visited all 50 states--Only 46 of the lower 48.
41. Taken care of someone who was drunk
42. Had amazing friends
43. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country
44. Watched wild whales
45. Stolen a sign
46. Backpacked in Europe
47. Taken a road-trip--Many Many times
48. Gone rock climbing
49. Midnight walk on the beach
50. Gone sky diving
51. Visited Ireland--but it's on my list seeing that I'm half Irish
52. Been heartbroken longer than you were actually in love
53. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger’s table and had a meal with them
54. Visited Japan
55. Milked a cow
56. Alphabetized your CDs--thank God for MP3s
57. Pretended to be a superhero. Every Wedns--oops, Sorry honey
58. Sung karaoke
59. Lounged around in bed all day
60. Played touch football
61. Gone scuba diving
62. Kissed in the rain
63. Played in the mud
64. Played in the rain
65. Gone to a drive-in theater--and in the rain
66. Visited the Great Wall of China--No, but I accidentally pulled all of my mother's china off the wall trying to climb up to get a glass.
67. Started a business
68. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken. Still and always
69. Toured ancient sites--Have you seen my cave?
70. Taken a martial arts class--only from friends
71. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight--only online versions
72. Gotten married
73. Been in a movie--No, but I starred as Dead Bernie's (from Weekend at Bernies) Dead brother Ernie for a Venus swimwear competition video that we made for a local bar competition. Dead Ernie was the reporter that interviewed the Venus girls, so, because I had to play dead, it took 4 people to animate me for the interviews.
74. Crashed a party
75. Gotten divorced
76. Gone without food for 5 days
77. Made cookies from scratch
78. Won first prize in a costume contest
79. Ridden a gondola in Venice
80. Gotten a tattoo
81. Rafted the Snake River
82. Been on television news programs as an “expert”
83. Got flowers for no reason
84. Performed on stage
85. Been to Las Vegas
86. Recorded music
87. Eaten shark
88. Kissed on the first date--Nope, got married first.
89. Gone to Thailand
90. Bought a house
91. Been in a combat zone
92. Buried one/both of your parents
93. Been on a cruise ship
94. Spoken more than one language fluently
95. Performed in Rocky Horror--Went as Dr. Frankenfurter every halloween though
96. Raised children
97. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour--there was no room on the bus #98 took the last seat.
99. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country
100. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over
101. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge
102. Sang loudly in the car, and didn’t stop when you knew someone was looking--I wouldn't advise it though. It really upsets the police officers driving.
103. Had plastic surgery--All my surgeries used real flesh.
104. Survived an accident that you shouldn’t have survived
105. Wrote articles for a large publication
106. Lost over 100 pounds--35 at one point.
107. Held someone while they were having a flashback--oh probably
108. Piloted an airplane
109. Touched a stingray--You mean a vintage corvette don't you
110. Broken someone’s heart
111. Helped an animal give birth
112. Won money on a T.V. game show
113. Broken a bone
114. Gone on an African photo safari
115. Had a facial part pierced other than your ears
116. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol
117. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild
118. Ridden a horse
119. Had major surgery
120. Had a snake as a pet
121. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon
122. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours
123. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. states
124. Visited all 7 continents
125. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
126. Eaten kangaroo meat--alligator and ostridge though.
127. Eaten sushi
128. Had your picture in the newspaper
129. Changed someone’s mind about something you care deeply about
130. Gone back to school
131. Parasailed
132. Touched a cockroach
133. Eaten fried green tomatoes
134. Read The Iliad - and the Odyssey--In highschool, read most of both for assignments.
135. Selected one “important” author who you missed in school, and read
136. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
137. Skipped all your school reunions
138. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language
139. Been elected to public office
140. Written your own computer language--written a basic compiler for computing courses
141. Thought to yourself that you’re living your dream
142. Had to put someone you love into hospice care--My wife's father, near the very end.
143. Built your own PC from parts
144. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn’t know you--No I usually give my artwork away.
145. Had a booth at a street fair
146. Dyed your hair
147. Been a DJ
148. Shaved your head--For Charities for cancer
149. Caused a car accident--when I was five
150. Saved someone’s life
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